Last night I spoke to a group of homeschooling moms on one of the topics from my upcoming book It's No Secret. This new session is called "Adjust Your Scale" and it deals with women's tendencies toward perfectionism. And our need to grant and accept grace. (You can relate, right?)
This was the first time I've given this message so my excitement was tinged with uncertainty. Will they laugh at the parts I think are funny? Will they take notes on the parts I think are vital? Will they remember the bottom line 2 days from now?
It seemed to go well. Being teacher-types, they were excellent listeners. And very engaged in the group discussion time as well. Plus, most the women were still there 30 minutes after the official ending time of 9:00 PM so they were clearly enjoying the chance to connect and get real with like-minded moms. That was so great to see.
After giving a new message, I go back and tweak it based on how it went over and any feedback I receive from the audience afterward. So that's on my to-do list this week. I know you weren't there to hear it, but I'd love for you to share with me what areas of life you struggle the most with perfectionism. Maybe I can address some of those the next time I give this message, or incorporate more examples in my talk.
So all you perfectionistic types – please, do spill the beans on what you obsess about. What has to be perfect?
Are you an overall perfectionist, or do you have specific things you're obsessive about? Like, I wonder if you have a certain thing that if you can just keep that part perfect, you feel a sense of control despite the rest of the chaos. For me, it's a clean kitchen floor. I have to have a clean kitchen floor. I usually sweep it twice a day and mop it twice a week. The rest of the house can be falling apart but as long as the kitchen floor is clean, I can feel sane. Well, that and my toenails. I have to keep my toenails painted too, with no chipping ...
PS. You do know that being perfectionistic doesn't mean you do things perfectly, right? Only that you realllllly want to do things perfectly. And you get quite irritable when it's not perfect. And sometimes you don't do them at all if you think it won't be perfect. Sound at all familiar?
Super thankful for God’s mercy and grace.