Monday, April 27, 2009

A Marriage Story

Remember when I spoke at my church back in March during a sermon series on lust?

After that I received an email from a woman who knew her husband was having an affair. She hinted about it on the way home from church that day - I think hoping the sermon series had softened his heart - but he stonewalled. So she was seeking some advice and prayer from me. She did not want her marriage to end, yet she was frustrated and hurt.

I responded and told her to pray. I suggested she not to get into any conversations with him about it just yet - let God work on her heart and his first. I told her to love her husband afresh, despite the affair, because love is the most transformational power in the universe. And I suggested she surround herself with wise counsel. That's my response in a nutshell.

Honestly, I didn't know if it was going to turn out well. But I heard from her again a few weeks later:

"This is just a note to let you know i did seek wise counsel and had friends walking and praying along the path to confrontation ... i have felt the lord every step of the way and waiting for his timing and his peace brought a quite different outcome than had i forged ahead like a bull in a china shop. We are healing and heading toward forgiveness, reconcilliation restoration and defining a new marriage as neither one of us can go back to how it was before. it has given the title of husband and wife a whole new sense of responsibility and honor worthy of respect and the hard work to deserve the position.

i could write a book about my journey and god's grace but right now i am focused on walking with god every step on the road to the future. thanks for listening - thanks again for coming to church to speak and for encouraging me to seek god."

It is AMAZING what God can accomplish - even things that seem impossible in our hearts and minds!


  1. Praise God. He is Faithful.

  2. Thank you for this encouraging post. Even though I'm post divorce by 17 months, I still believe in His power to restore us. I reflect on your words that love has tranformational power. I don't have a lot of opportunity to show love to my beloved. He has no contact with me but any contact I try to initiate I do my best to show it in love.

    I trust in the Lord's timing and as you shared with this lady, I continue to trust Him to work on my heart and beloved's heart too.

    I covet your prayers, if only one for today. May God continue to work in the life of my beloved (CBP) and soften his heart towards the reconciliation God desires per His word.
    In Him,

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  4. Rachel...great advice you gave her. This is coming from one who has been the forgiver and the one who needed grace as we both ignored our vows. God has restored us and taken us to a whole new place in our relationship. NO OUTSIDERS welcome! :)

    Such an important post...thanks for sharing it.

    Love ya,


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